Moving?

Hi there,

So work-wise it is hard to find something for me right now. Despite sending around 30-40 applications per month since October it seems I am out of luck. The independent woman in me feel defeated and the stubborn lady in me says DON´T give up! The stubborn lady in me wants to stay in the Netherlands but it looks like this ain´t gonna happen. I was considering going back to Norway and then continue the search in the Netherlands, yet now I think I am to my wits end with it and might just go back to Norway and then move to Bergen or something like that....

Rejection after rejection takes a toll on you and it feels like there are too many obstacles here to handle at the moment. It feels heavy to make a decision, yet this week is decision time and I feel real sad about it. Everything that has happened on the way, all the memories and hopes I had to build something great over here are slowly dying along with the part of me that wants to stay.

I am 29 and should have been a manager or owner of my own company already and instead I am here without much to be proud of. It makes me sad, real sad should I be forced to leave. Yet maybe I can make the best out of life and finally start a it in Norway? Today I have decided to start searching for Norwegian jobs as well in Bergen, Stavanger and Kristiansand (the West and South of Norway). Reason being I will then still have some friends and family near me and they are all cities with an airport.

There have been points where I have been sending applications all day and points when I have been crying myself to sleep because I did not want it to come to this point yet finally I am facing the fact. Maybe the Netherlands is not the place where I was meant to thrive? Maybe there are other things I were meant to do and maybe I was meant to do them back home? I am not sure what to think anymore, just feels like all the sacrifices I made to stay here for all kind of reasons were all for nothing and the best friends I could have asked for will be so far away once I leave. To start again is just so damb hard.... but when staying behind gets harder I am thinking there is little choice left.

By looking for jobs in Norway I might just catch myself before it is too late, though I have heard it is difficult times there as well in terms of jobs.

What to do? Where to go? It is heavy....

xx Viking